If you really love me
by Slayer88
Summary: Buffy's pregnant... but how? Takes place in the fourth season. ***COMPLETE***
1. Default Chapter

Author's Note: Got any ideas for a title? Please review  
  
  
  
Angel is walking in the dark tunnels. Two glowing  
  
green eyes watch him from behind. Suddenly the demon  
  
jumps out and attacks him from behind slicing across  
  
the palm of Angel's right hand as he spins around. Angel  
  
looks at the blood on his hand then vamps out and attacks.  
  
They fight. The demon slices off the head of Angel's  
  
battle-ax, and Angel manages to knock the sword out of  
  
the demon's hand. The demon pulls his short sword (about  
  
the same length as what's left of the ax handle) and they  
  
continue fighting. In the end Angel manages to grab the  
  
demon's sword hand and turns its hand to stab it in the  
  
heart with its own sword. The demon falls back as  
  
Angel stares at the glowing green blood that covers  
  
his cut right hand.  
  
The blood swirls around and sinks into his cut, which closes  
  
up in front of his eyes. A light races from his right hand  
  
through his whole body as Angel collapses with a strangled  
  
cry. Angel comes back up gasping for air while we hear the  
  
sound of a heart beating.  
  
Angel staring at his hand in disbelief "I'm alive."  
  
  
  
Angel and Buffy sitting at opposite sides of his  
  
kitchen table.  
  
Angel pours her some tea "Would you like some more?"  
  
"No, thank you."  
  
"I'm really sorry I kissed you like that."  
  
"You are?"  
  
"Well, not for the kiss itself…"  
  
"Good. I mean, 'cause - as far as kisses go I  
  
thought it was well above average."  
  
"It was incredible. I just - I-I think, maybe we'd  
  
be asking for trouble rushing back into things. (Buffy  
  
looks at him) Not that I don't want to - rush. Believe  
  
me, I do."  
  
"Right. You spoke to the Oracles and they said  
  
you were cured for good. But how do we know that they  
  
really speak for the Powers? I mean they could be -  
  
pranksters."  
  
"Or there could be another loophole."  
  
"Exactly. And then the two of us would be in even  
  
deeper and it's 'grr' all over again."  
  
"It would be smart to wait a while. See if this  
  
mortal thing takes."  
  
"Exactly. And even if it does, it's still  
  
complicated."  
  
"You're still the Slayer. And I'm not sure what  
  
I am now. I don't know what my purpose is. I can't  
  
just wedge myself into your life back in Sunnydale. It  
  
wouldn't be good for either of us. Not to mention the  
  
fact that you just started college. And what about slaying.  
  
I mean, if you had me to worry about, you might not be as  
  
focused."  
  
"Are you going to pull out a pie chart on me now?  
  
Because I get it, it's not necessary."  
  
Angel gets up with a sigh and moves to the chair next to  
  
Her. "I'm not saying I don't want you. You know how  
  
much.. I'm just saying it's worth the wait to be sure  
  
this is right. I need to be sure you won't get hurt  
  
again."  
  
Buffy stands up. "You know it's a good thing I didn't fantasize  
  
about you turning human only about 10 zillion times, because  
  
today would have been a real let down. - So how does the  
  
mature plan go? You call me? I call you? What?"  
  
Angel gets up and steps over to her. "We stay in touch -  
  
just not.."  
  
"Literally. - Funny. (They stare at each other,  
  
then Buffy walks past him) Okay, I'd better.."  
  
"Right. Remove the temptation."  
  
"So, we'll - talk soon."  
  
Buffy puts her hand on top of his on the counter. They both  
  
stare down at their hands. Angel turns his hand to grab  
  
hers then reaches out and pulls her into a kiss. They  
  
stumble up against the fridge and Buffy jumps up to wrap  
  
her legs around his waist. Still kissing, Angel carries  
  
her over to the kitchen table, sweeps the stuff on it  
  
on the floor and lays her down on it.  
  
  
  
Buffy is wearing a long flowery dress is pacing Angel's apartment.  
  
Angel comes down the steps to his apartment.  
  
"I'm guessing that expression isn't because they  
  
were all out of fresh OJ at the deli. - What happened?"  
  
"Nothing happened. - I just…"  
  
"Where have you been?"  
  
"I went to see the Oracles. I asked them to turn  
  
me back."  
  
"What? - Why?"  
  
"Because more then ever I know how much I love you."  
  
Buffy backs away from him "No. No, you didn't."  
  
Angel follows her "And if I stayed mortal one of us would  
  
wind up dead, maybe both of us. You heard what Mohra said."  
  
"Mohra is dead. We killed him."  
  
"He said others would come."  
  
"They always come. And they always will. But  
  
that's my problem now, not yours, remember?"  
  
"No, I won't just stand by and let you fight,  
  
maybe die, alone."  
  
"Then we fight together."  
  
"You saw what happened last night. If anything I'm  
  
a liability to you. You take chances to protect me, and  
  
that's not just bad for you, it's bad for the people we  
  
were meant to help."  
  
"So what? You just took a whole 24 hours to weigh  
  
the ups and downs of being a regular Joe and decided it  
  
was more fun being a superhero?"  
  
"You know that's not it. How can we be together  
  
if the cost is your life, or the lives of others? (Buffy  
  
just stares at him and after a moment he takes her into  
  
his arms) I know. I couldn't tell you. I wasn't sure  
  
- if I could do it if I woke up with you one more morning."  
  
"I understand. - So, what happens now?  
  
"The Oracles are giving us back the day, turning back  
  
time, so I can kill Mohra before his blood makes me mortal."  
  
"When?"  
  
Angel looks over at the clock (it's 9:00) "Another minute."  
  
"A minute? No. No, it's not enough time!"  
  
"We don't have a choice. It's done."  
  
"How am I supposed to go on with my life knowing  
  
what we had? What we could have had?"  
  
"You won't. No one will know but me."  
  
"Everything we did."  
  
"It never happened."  
  
"It did. It did. I know it did!  
  
(Puts her hand on his heart) I felt your heart beat."  
  
"Buffy.."  
  
They kiss. Buffy looks over at the clock. The minute is  
  
almost up.  
  
"No! Oh God. It's not enough time."  
  
"Shh, please. Please."  
  
The hold each other tightly both crying.  
  
"Please, please."  
  
"No. I'll never forget. I'll never forget. I'll  
  
never forget. I'll never forget."  
  
White flash dissolves to Angel's office the previous day.  
  
Angel is leaning against his desk blinking, looking around.  
  
Buffy is standing next to the door.  
  
"So, then let's just stick to the plan. Keep our  
  
distance until a lot of time has passed, and given enough  
  
time - we should be able to.."  
  
Angel stares at her and swallows hard. "Forget."  
  
  
  
Two months later:  
  
Buffy's alarm buzzed but there was no one in bed to wake up. In the bathroom Buffy moaned. Her head hung above the toilet. She had just emptied herself of last nights dinner. "Oh God!" She clutched her stomach and gagged. There was nothing left in her stomach to be regurgitated. Buffy flushed the toilet then walked back into her and Willow's dorm. "What's wrong?" Willow asked her friend when she saw Buffy's pale face. "I threw up again." "That's the third time this week." "I know. I wish I knew what is wrong with me." Buffy sat down on her bed. "Are you going to class today?" Willow asked. "No, I think I am going to stay here and get some sleep. I stayed up most of the night." "Okay. Well I'll come by at noon and see how you're doing." "I'll see you then." Buffy said as Willow headed for the door. "Will." "Yeah?" The redhead turned to face Buffy. "Tell Riley I'm sorry about last night." "I will." With that Willow left for class. The night before Riley had taken Buffy out for dinner in one of the fanciest restaurants in Sunneydale but they left early because Buffy got sick in the bathroom. Buffy laid down on her soft bed and drifted off to sleep.  
  
Three hours later:  
  
Willow and Riley walked into the dorm room where Buffy was sprawled on her bed fast asleep. "She was up most of the night," Willow said when she saw the slayer was sleeping. "I figured she would be," Riley said as he walked over to his sleeping girlfriend and sat next to her. He brushed a hair out of her face and kissed her forehead. Buffy slowly opened her eyes. "Hey," she said when she saw Riley looking over her. "Go back to sleep," he said as he stood up. "I don't wanna. You're here now." "I have to go I just came by to check on you." "Thanks mom," Buffy responded sarcastically. "Bye." Riley kissed her and walked out. Buffy watched him go. He loved her so much but she could never bring herself to return the love. She just didn't feel that way about him. The only one she had ever felt that way about was Angel and he left her. Buffy swung her feet over the side of the bed. "Whoa," she said as she was rushed by a wave of dizziness. "What's wrong?" Willow asked worriedly. "I'm just dizzy. It's nothing." Willow looked her in the eye. "Not to jump to conclusions or anything, but are you… is there any possibility that your pregnant?" 


	2. Chapter 2

Buffy looked at her friend in shock. "That's impossible," she said, still stunned. "Buffy, you never know." "No, its impossible. Riley and I haven't… I haven't slept with anyone since Parker." Willow didn't believe her. Buffy and Riley were pretty close and she was showing all the symptoms of the early stages of pregnancy. "Why don't we just go get a test to be sure?" Buffy was getting annoyed that her best friend wouldn't believe her, but she didn't feel like arguing. She would just take the test and prove to Willow that she wasn't pregnant. "Okay fine. I'll take the stupid test."  
  
30 minutes later in the local drug store  
  
"I still don't see why I'm here. I told you, I can't be pregnant," Buffy complained for what seemed like the millionth time. She and Willow walked up the pharmacy isle. Willow came to a stop in front of the pregnancy tests. She started to carefully read each kind. After about five minutes Buffy got annoyed. "It doesn't matter what one you get. They're all the same and they will all say I'm not pregnant." She grabbed one off the shelf and walked to the check out line. "Hello ladies." Buffy and Willow turned around to find Xander holding a plastic bag. Buffy instantly shoved the pregnancy test behind her back and tried to look like nothing was going on. Even though in her head there was a lot going on. "Xander, hi!" Buffy said. "What are you girls here for?" Xander asked. Willow thought quickly. "Tampons," she said simply. "Oh…um…well I uh should go… I am just picking something up for my mom and I uh have it right here so bye." Xander walked quickly. "May I help you?" the curly haired lady a standing behind the counter asked them. "Oh, uh yes." Buffy put the box on the counter and paid for it quickly.  
  
Willow and Buffy's dorm:  
  
Willow paced around the room. Buffy had been in the bathroom for at least ten minutes. Finally the door opened and Buffy stepped out. Her face was pale and her hands were shaking. "It has to be wrong." She looked pleadingly at Willow. 


	3. Chapter 3

Author's Note: Please review.  
  
"It's lying." "Buffy, calm down," Willow said trying to sooth her friend. "These tests aren't one hundred percent accurate. I have to go to class but when I get back we'll go back to the store and get another one." Willow walked over to Buffy and hugged her. She got her books and left. Buffy sat down on her bed. 'I can't wait for two hours,' she thought after about ten minutes. She got up and walked out the door.  
  
Back at the drug store:  
  
Buffy, once again, made her way down the pharmacy aisle. There were only six tests left. She grabbed all of them and quickly paid the lady behind the counter.  
  
When she got back to her dorm she opened the boxes and took the tests. When she was done with them she laid all of the testing sticks out on the bathroom floor and waited. Five out of the six turned pink. She collapsed on the floor and tried to control herself but was unable to stop sobbing.  
  
Willow walked into her dorm to find the bathroom door open and her a sobbing mess. "Oh Buffy!" Willow said when she found her sprawled out on the floor crying hysterically. Willow wrapped her arms around her and hugged her friend for what seemed like the millionth time that day. Buffy finally pulled away and looked down at the tests. "I just don't understand how this is possible," Buffy said. Willow looked at her. "We live on a hellmouth; we don't understand half the stuff that ever happens here. It just happens. Were not allowed explanations," she said. Buffy looked up. "I guess we should tell Giles."  
  
Giles' Apartment:  
  
There was a knock on Giles' front door. "Coming," he said. He opened the door. "Buffy, Willow, come in." The two girls walked into the apartment. "I'm glad you came, I have been meaning to talk to you about a demon…" he paused. "What's wrong?" Giles said when he saw their expressions. "Buffy's…well she's…um…" Willow searched for the right words. "Giles, I'm pregnant," Buffy said plainly. "Oh…wow. This is a shock. How? No, wait I know how." "No you don't." Buffy cut him off. "I don't even know how. I haven't ah… been with someone, in that sense, since Parker." "What about Riley?" Giles asked dumbly. "We haven't. Not yet at least." "Well then how?" he asked, still in shock. "I don't know how. I just said that." She was getting annoyed. "I'll see what I can find, but this is extremely odd," he walked over to his bookshelf. "Really? I thought people got pregnant from NOT having sex all the time," she said sarcastically. "Have a seat. Would you like any tea?" Giles asked as he helped Buffy sit down. "No, thanks." The last thing she needed right now was some of Giles' tea. "Are you sure that you're… well…?" he asked. "I'm pregnant. You can say it. Yes I'm sure, I took the test seven times." "Oh," was his only response. "Have you told Riley yet?" "I totally forgot about him. How am I going to tell him? He's never going to believe me." "Buffy, if Riley really loves you he'll believe you," Willow said reassuringly. "I have to go tell him," Buffy said as she walked out the door. Willow spoke up when she was sure Buffy was gone. "Giles, do you remember when Buffy went to L.A. at Thanksgiving?" she asked. "Yes, but she wouldn't have. Angel would have lost his soul and Buffy is a smart girl. She would never put herself and her friends in that kind of danger," he said. "Yeah I guess your right," Willow said.  
  
The UC Sunneydale campus:  
  
Buffy found Riley sitting on a bench with papers he was grading for Professor Walsh's class. "Hey." Riley stood up as Buffy walked toward him. He gave her a quick kiss and sat back down. "Riley, you know I would never lie to you right?" "Of course… Buffy, what's wrong?" "I'm pregnant, but I swear I would never cheat on you," Buffy rushed. "I can't believe this. I love you and this is what I get in return," Riley said. "Riley listen to me, I haven't had sex with anyone since Parker," She said, trying to convince him. "Then how did you get pregnant?" "I don't know. Giles is looking it up right now and seeing if there has been any other cases of someone getting pregnant without actually having sex." "I think I need to take a walk." Riley got up and gathered his things. Buffy thought of what Willow has said at Giles' apartment, 'If Riley really loves you he'll believe you.' "You don't believe me do you?" she asked. "No, Buffy I do believe you. I just need to think about some things," he said as he walked away.  
  
Buffy and Willow's dorm:  
  
Willow entered her dorm room and checked to make sure Buffy wasn't there. She picked up the phone and dialed Angel's number. "Angel Investigations, we help the helpless. How may I help you?" "Cordelia, this is Willow. May I speak to Angel?" "Yeah, hold on." Willow waited about two minutes before Angel picked up the phone. "Yeah?" 'He must have been sleeping,' she thought. "Angel this is Willow." "Hey Willow. What's up?" "Angel, don't take this the wrong way, but is there any chance you and Buffy…uh… possibly….um…." "What is it Willow?" Angel could tell by the way she stalled that she was about to ask him something important. "Over Thanksgiving, did you and Buffy have sex?" Angel was surprised. 'How could she know that?' he thought. "No," he lied. "Willow what's going on?" he asked. "Buffy's pregnant and she hasn't had sex since September." 'That's impossible,' he thought. "I have to go, but I'm coming down to Sunneydale," Angel said, and hung up the phone.  
  
TBC… Wait and see. 


	4. Chapter 4

Buffy had been trying to reach Riley all day. When she got home from her last  
  
class of the day she decided to try again. All she got was his machine. She didn't leave a message. She'd already left five that day. 'If Riley really loves you he'll believe you.' Buffy couldn't get those haunting words out of her head. 'Stop it!' She told herself as she got up to go get some ice cream she had major cravings for. When she reached the door the phone rang. She ran to get it. "Riley?" Buffy asked before she even said "Hello?" "No, sorry, Buffy, it's just me." "Oh… hey, Giles. Any news?" "No, I'm sorry. I just called because I need to talk to you," he said seriously. "Okay, do you want me to come over?" "Yes, please." "Okay. I'll be right there." She hung up the phone and walked out the door without remembering to lock it.  
  
Giles' Apartment:  
  
"Giles?" Buffy called as she opened the door to his apartment. She took a step in and closed the door. Buffy sat down on his uncomfortable couch. Giles walked in and jumped when he saw her. "You okay?" "I didn't hear you come in," he said, still a little shaken up. "You called me. Remember?" "Yes, I just thought it would take you a little longer to get here, that's all. Would you like some tea?" he asked as his teapot whistled in the kitchen. "Sure," Buffy said. Giles walked to the screaming kettle. About five minutes later he returned with two steaming mugs. He handed one to Buffy and kept one for himself. He sat down on the chair facing her. Giles took his glasses off, wiped them with his shirt and replaced them. "The weather certainly nice today isn't it?" "Giles, it's cloudy and raining." "Reminds me of home." "Did you invite me over to talk about the weather? I have a fatherless child growing inside of me, and a boyfriend who isn't talking to me. I don't have time for weather," she said, irritated. "I called you over to talk about the baby," Giles said finally. "What about it? Did you find anything?" Buffy pestered him with questions. "No, I haven't. I called you over to talk to you about… Have you considered having an abortion?" "What? How could you even think that? Your supposed to support me through this!" she yelled. "I am supporting you." Giles paused. "Think about what kind of life this child will have. It will always be in danger. You're going to have to raise it on your own. Your probably won't live past twenty. And what about patrol? You can't patrol pregnant." "Then I quit. I quit slaying, I'll live a normal life and raise my baby." "You know that's not possible, Buffy" "Well, nothing is going to stop me from having this baby! She stormed out of the apartment.  
  
UC Sunneydale Campus  
  
Buffy marched down the hallway to her dorm. 'How could he betray me like that.' she thought angrily. As she approached her dorm room she fished her key out of her purse. She put it in the keyhole. The door was already unlocked. She opened it and flicked on the light. Angel was sitting on her bed holding Mr. Gordo. 


	5. Chapter 5

"Angel?" Buffy asked as she stepped into her room. He turned around. "What are you doing here?" "Willow called me and told me the news. Congratulations." "Thanks. You didn't have to come out here… not that I'm not happy you did. Believe me I'm happy you're here." "I wanted to. I just wanted to see how you're doing and be here for you through all of this." "Thank you, Angel. You have no idea how much this means to me." Angel smiled and looked at her stomach. 'My baby is in there,' he thought to himself. "You look great." "Just wait a few months then I'll look like a cow." He laughed. "I don't think that's possible," he said. "How long are you staying?" Buffy tried to change the subject before it became too much for her to handle. "As long as you want me too," he replied. "What about L.A.?" "L.A. can wait. Right now I'd rather be here." "Do you have a place to stay?" "I think I am going to stay in the mansion for now. It doesn't have any big windows so the sun should stay out pretty well." "How long have you been here?" I got here about an hour ago. I just dropped my stuff off then came over here." "Oh," Buffy said, followed by a long silence that was broken by Angel. "I should get going," he said as he made his way towards the window and put one leg through it. "I'm glad you came," she said. Angel turned and looked at her. "So am I." With that he disappeared into the night.  
  
UC Sunneydale Campus:  
  
It was five A.M. when Willow realized she had fallen asleep at Giles' apartment, researching. Now she was standing in front of the door to her dorm. 'Buffy's must likely sleeping,' she thought. She quietly opened the door to her dorm and tip toed inside. Buffy was laying down on her bed. "You didn't tell me Angel was coming." Willow jumped. "I thought you were asleep." "Well I'm not. Why didn't you tell me?" "If I told you, you'd freak. Giles and I both agreed it was best to not tell you." "Maybe you're right. I do overreact sometimes." Buffy rolled over onto her side and closed her eyes.  
  
Giles' apartment:  
  
Buffy and Giles had been researching all morning. Buffy suddenly slammed her book shut. Giles looked up. "Do you realize I still have to tell my mother? She's going to kill me." "You haven't told her yet?" "Well… not exactly. But, I just got this great idea." "What's that?" "You tell her." "No." Giles looked back down at his book. "Hi mom. I'm pregnant but I haven't had sex.' Giles she will never believe me." "You're going to be a mother you need to take some responsibility." "Responsibility? I have responsibility. I have to save the world." "What do you expect me to say?" "I don't know. Think of something." The phone interrupted Buffy. She picked it up. "Hello?" "Hi, it's me," Angel said. "Willow said you'd be at Giles'." "She was right." "Do you have any maternity clothes?" "What?" Buffy asked. "I want to take you shopping tonight. It'll get us a chance to catch up on stuff." "Okay" "I'll pick you up at sunset," he said. "Okay, see you then." Buffy hung up the phone. "Giles please tell her," she begged. "Fine. I'll tell her." "Thank you." Buffy walked out of the apartment. When she closed the door Giles picked up the phone. "Hello? Joyce?" 'How the hell did she talk me into this?' he thought to himself. "Yes, this is Mr. Giles. I have some news."  
  
Later that night:  
  
Buffy checked herself in the mirror. She looked good. No, better than good. She looked great. Angel knocked on the door. Buffy opened it. "Wow! You actually used the door," she said sarcastically. "I was trying to be polite. You ready?" "Yup. Let me get my bag." Buffy grabbed her purse off the table and they left.  
  
Sunneydale Mall:  
  
"How come fat people can't dress cool?" Buffy complained. They had been shopping for two hours and still hadn't found anything. "I mean seriously what is with all the high water pants with pouches in the front? And don't even get me started with the shirts." Angel laughed. "They're going to close soon. Lets try out 'Pea in a Pod.'if we don't find anything we can always try again another time." "Okay," Buffy agreed. About half an hour later Buffy finally found a pair of pants and a shirt she liked.  
  
"I had a great time." Buffy said when Angel dropped her off. "So did I. You want to go to dinner tomorrow?" "Riley…" "No, not a date just as friends." "Oh okay," Buffy said trying to hide her embarrassment and disappointment. "So I'll see you tomorrow then?" Angel asked. "Yeah, see you then." She closed the door behind her.  
  
TBC…. Angel and Buffy have dinner. Angel and Riley meet. 


	6. Chapter 6

"How did she take it?" Buffy walked into Giles' apartment. "She was upset that you weren't the one to tell her." Giles was sitting on the couch with a book in one hand and a cup of tea in the other. He lifted the cup to his lips and took a sip. "Well, what did she expect? When I told her I was a vampire slayer she freaked. She told me I needed help and to never come back. How do you think she would react if I told her I was pregnant?" "You need to talk to her," Giles said. "What do you want me to say?" "Just talk to her. Right now she thinks you're afraid of her. You don't need to talk about the baby at all" "She's going to bring it up." "Do you have any idea what it feels like to have someone be afraid of you?" Buffy didn't say anything. "That's what I thought." "Fine. I'll go see her this afternoon."  
  
The Summer's house:  
  
Joyce was in the kitchen when Buffy walked in the house. "Mom?" she called. Joyce didn't respond. "Mom?" Buffy walked into the kitchen. She found her mom washing dishes. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you," Buffy said apologetically. "How many people know?" "Giles, Willow, Riley, Angel and you." "Angel? You told your ex-boyfriend before telling me?" Joyce paused. "I'm your mother. He's not even a part of your life anymore." "Angel will always be a part of my life." "Don't talk like that. You have Riley now. He's a nice boy. You're lucky he didn't leave you after you told him." 'No, he's just not talking to me,' Buffy thought. "Look Mom, this isn't about my love life, this is about us." "You're right. This is about how my daughter betrayed me." "You know how you would have acted if I told you. You never would have believed me. You gave me no choice." "Maybe your right, but maybe not. Dammit, Buffy, how do you expect me to support you if you can't talk to me?" "I don't need your goddamn support." Buffy walked out the door and slammed it behind her. Joyce jumped at the sound and dropped the plate she was holding. She didn't bother to pick up the pieces.  
  
Sunneydale Cemetery:  
  
Riley and Forest were taking Buffy's place patrolling the cemetery. "Buffy's pregnant," Riley said. "Congratulations!" "It's not mine." "Then who's the father?" "I don't know and neither does she. She says that she hasn't slept with anyone since September. She has no memory of it" "Does she really think you'd fall for that?" "She's not lying." Forest stopped in his tracks. "What are you going to do?" Forest asked. "I don't know. I can't picture myself helping her raise a child that isn't mine."  
  
Angel was also out patrolling when he heard Riley and Forest talking. He kneeled behind a gravestone and listened.  
  
"Are you going to leave her?" "I don't know. It's hard to imagine life without her." "Is she keeping the baby?" "Yeah, I think so. She would never agree to an abortion." Riley paused. "I almost wish she would though. Maybe there's some way I could convince her." Suddenly Angel jumped from behind the gravestone and knocked Riley to the ground. Angel got in a few punches before Forest tried to pull him off Riley. Angel grabbed Forest by the neck and threw him. He looked down at Riley. "What the hell?" Riley said when he saw that Angel was a vampire. Angel threw one more punch before standing up. " If you ever come near Buffy or the baby, Ill kill you." Suddenly everything clicked. "You're the father aren't you," Riley said. Angel gave him a sharp kick to the stomach and walked away.  
  
"Russo's Italian Kitchen":  
  
"I talked to my mom today." Buffy and Angel were finishing dinner at a fancy Italian restaurant. "How did she take it?" "Not very well." There was only one piece of chicken left on Buff's plate. She brought it to her mouth. "Give her time. She'll come around." "I guess you're right." Buffy clutched her stomach. "I think I'm going to be sick." She got up and raced to the bathroom. Angel paid the bill. 'I have to tell her tonight,' he thought to himself. 'We'll take a walk and I'll tell her then… no, I have to quit putting it off. I'll tell her here.' Angel's thoughts were interrupted when she returned. "You okay?" he said. "Yeah, I feel a lot better." Buffy sat back down. "Did you want dessert? I already paid, but if you want we can still get some," he asked, a little too rushed. "That's okay. I don't think I would be able to keep it down… are you okay? Angel, what's wrong?" He looked down. "When you came for Thanksgiving, the Oracles gave me a gift. They made me human…" "What are you saying?" Buffy asked, confused. "I think I'm the father." She stared at him in shock. "That's impossible. Believe me, I would remember something like that." "No. I asked for them to erase the day, because I couldn't protect you as a human. They gave me the memory to make sure it would never happen again. I'm the only one who remembers it. I should have told you sooner, I'm sorry." "You just made this decision without even asking me?" Buffy was trying unsuccessfully to stay calm. "It was for the best." "First my mom, then you. I can't take this." She grabbed her purse and ran out of the restaurant. Angel chased after her. "Damn, what did you do, screw her sister?" a waiter asked. Angel ran past him and out the glass doors. Suddenly it was as if he was seeing everything in slow motion. Buffy was running across the street with a blue mustang heading right towards her. The driver slammed on the breaks, but it was too late. She flipped over the hood on impact, and hit the ground with a thud.  
  
TBC…  
  
Feedback is appreciated. ~ Thanks 


	7. Chapter 7

Hospital:  
  
Angel paced back and forth in the hospital waiting room. He couldn't think straight. He kept replaying the accident over and over again in his head. He walked out of the waiting room and to the nearest pay phone to call Giles. "Hello?" "Giles… there's been an accident." "Angel?" Yeah. Call the others and meet me at the hospital." Angel hung up and walked back to the waiting room. A man in his mid-twenties came in and sat down on the couch. Angel examined his features. He looked nervous, but excited. He pulled a small book out of his coat pocket. Angel took a closer look at it. The book was titled The Joy of Fatherhood. The man noticed that Angel was looking at it. "My girlfriend is having my daughter soon." Angel smiled. "Were going to name her Meredith." "That's a nice name," Angel said. "Thank you. It's my mother's name. I'm Clark." He held out his hand. "Angel." He took Clark's hand and shook it. The door slowly opened and a nurse poked her head in. "Mr. Matthews, we're are going to move Lily to the delivery room now." "Nice meeting you," Clark said as he got up and followed the nurse down the hall.  
  
15 minutes later:  
  
Around one o'clock Giles rushed into the waiting room followed by Willow and Xander. Angel was sitting in a chair with his face buried in his hands. "What happened?" Giles asked. "You probably want to sit down." Angel stared at the ground as he spoke. All three of them took a seat. "Buffy was in an accident." Angel combed his hands through his hair. "She was hit by a car. She's in the emergency room right now." "How bad is she?" Willow asked. "I don't know. She flipped over the hood of the car. When I got to her she was unconscious. The driver called 911 and I rode in the ambulance with her, but they wouldn't let me in the E.R." Angel stood up and started pacing back and forth again. "This is you fault you know," Xander said. "Whenever you come something bad always happens. When will you learn that?" "Xander…" Giles started to say but he ignored him. "All you ever do is cause Buffy pain!" "Xander, shut up!" Willow said quietly. Angel stopped pacing and suddenly punched his hand through the wall, making everyone jump. He pulled it out. His hand was covered in blood that trickled down his arm. He swallowed back a wave of blood lust and leaned against the wall. The room was overcome with silence. Finally Willow spoke. "Angel, come with me. We'll find a doctor who can bandage up you hand." Angel followed her out and closed the door behind him. "Don't listen to Xander. If you weren't here right now I have no idea how Buffy would handle everything," Willow said once the door was closed. "I know," Angel responded, ending the conversation.  
  
When they returned Angel had a bandage wrapped around his left hand. In the other hand he had a bill for repairs to the broken wall. He stuffed the bill inside the breast pocket of his coat and sat down. The waiting room doors opened and a doctor wearing a white coat and a stethoscope around his neck walked in. Everyone but Angel stood up. "How is she?" Giles asked. "The good news is she's lucky. It's not as bad as it looks. She has a mild concussion and a few cracked ribs. The bad news is that she hasn't regained conciseness. The longer she's unconscious the smaller her chances of a fast recovery are." The doctor looked at Angel and Xander. "Which one of you is the father of the baby?" Giles was the one who answered. "We don't exactly know…" "I am," Angel interrupted. Willow, Giles and Xander stared at him in shock. "Sir, please take a step outside with me." Angel followed the doctor out of the room. "I'm sorry sir, but the baby didn't survive." "Can I see Buffy?" Angel asked. "Down the hall, third room on your right," the doctor said before walking away.  
  
Angel opened the door to Buffy's room. The room was bare. It had a large window that didn't have much of a view and a TV in the corner. There was a chair in the opposite corner. Buffy lay motionless in a bed, placed in the center of the room. She had an IV tube inserted in her hand and a heart monitor. Angel pulled the chair up to the bed and took a seat. He traced her features with his eyes. She looked lifeless. Her face was pale and her hair was flat. Angel took her hand in his and closed his eyes. He stayed like that for hours. "Angel?" Willow said, interrupting his thoughts. He opened his eyes, but didn't look at her. "You should get home, the sun is going to rise soon." "What if she wakes up? I want to be here." "I'll call you if anything changes. I promise." Angel stood up. "I'll be back at sunset." "Get some rest," Willow said as Angel walked out.  
  
The next night:  
  
The sun seemed like it would never set. Angel had tried unsuccessfully to get some sleep. When the sun finally went down Angel left for the hospital. When he got there Joyce, Willow, Giles and Xander were all huddled around Buffy's bed. Angel gently tapped the already opened door and walked in. "Any change?" he asked. Willow shook her head. Joyce gave Angel a look that told him that she knew he was the father. "Can I have a minute alone with her?" Angel asked. "Sure." Willow walked out and everyone followed her. Angel took Giles' seat and pulled it close to the bed. "Come on, Buffy, you have to wake up. Giles, Willow, Xander, your mom, they can't live without you… I can't live without you." Angel swallowed back tears and covered his face with his hands. When Riley walked with a bouquet of flowers in he lowered them, but didn't look up. "How is she?" Angel didn't respond. "When I look at you all I see is a killer, but Buffy, she sees something else. I don't understand it and I don't want to. I think it's sick. When she wakes up tell her that I'm leaving and not to come looking for me. She's in love with someone else." Angel looked up. Riley had a black eye from when Angel had attacked him in the cemetery. Riley put the flowers on the nightstand next to Buffy and walked out. Angel took a closer look at the flowers. They were an assortment of spring colors. Riley hadn't left a card.  
  
2:00 AM:  
  
Angel was still sitting next to Buffy. He hadn't moved since he first got there. His eyes roamed around the room, from the IV bag to the window without a view. The room gave off the cold feeling of death. Angel looked at Buffy's bed and wondered how many people had died there. Would Buffy be next? 'Stop it,' he told himself. He looked at her face then back down to the ground. As if on cue her eyelids started to flutter and slowly opened. "Angel?" she said, barely a whisper. His head shot up. "Buffy?" He brought his hand to her face and stroked her cheek. "Oh God Buffy, I thought I'd lost you." Tears welled up in his eyes and this time he didn't fight them. Suddenly Giles rushed in. "What happened?" he asked. "She just woke up. Get a doctor." Angel said. Giles closed the door behind him and ran to get a doctor. "Angel…the baby…" Buffy said as she put her hand on her stomach protectively. "I'm sorry, Buffy." "What?" "I'm so sorry. I know how much you wanted this baby." Buffy broke down crying as Angel cradled her in his arms. "This was all my fault," she sobbed. "No, Buffy, don't say that. It's not your fault. There was nothing you could have done… shh." Her tears were soaking his shirt. Buffy looked up at him with tear stained cheeks. "This was my only chance of being normal, and raising a normal child… and now its gone." "You never know."  
  
5 years later:  
  
1 Buffy woke up in Angel's arms. She looked across the room to the crib  
  
against the wall. She stood up and walked over to it. In it, her infant daughter slept  
  
soundly. Buffy smiled and crawled back into bed. She laid her head on Angel's chest and  
  
listened to his steady heartbeat. The new baby would never replace the old one, but it was  
  
a start.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
1.1 Finis 


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